possessive - Dictionary Definition : pdl-inc.info
Feb 14, The subject of having a possessive or controlling relationship Yet, feeling connected to someone doesn't mean it is okay to act entitled, or to exert power over them. Even if our worst fears come true, and our partner does reject or to sit with our thoughts and feelings without being overpowered by them. Discover the 12 major red flags of possessiveness in relationships. Is your relationship healthy and supportive of your well-being, or unhealthy and Your partner keeps an eye on every little thing you do to the point of stalking you. Being possessive can ruin a relationship, but it's an easy attitude to when you got involved in the relationship—why do you want to change him or her now?.
We want our partners and ourselves for that matter to be fulfilled, well-rounded individuals who are fully alive. When we make our partner feel guilty for choosing to spend time with friends, for example, we actually shrink their world. Otherwise, we take the air and life out of the relationship. So how can you stop the possessive patterns in your relationship? The first step is to understand why you engage in controlling behavior, and the second step is to deal with the underlying feelings that drive you toward an unequal dynamic.
Most of us have some degree of fear and insecurity surrounding our close relationships.
Signs of Possessiveness in Relationships | Dating
These feelings can spring from deeper struggles we have with trust, low self-esteem, fears of rejection, loss or intimacy itself. These deep-seated emotions can lead to a desire to control.
Instead of exploring where these feelings come from, we tend to project them onto our partner and start acting out controlling behaviors that we hope will alleviate these painful feelings. For example, we may on some core level feel unlovable or like no one would ever choose us. This negative self-concept can lead us to act out all kinds of jealous or insecure behaviors with our partner.
We may act victimized and wounded by any comment or action that we can construe as disregarding or rejecting.
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- Be Mine: Dealing with Possessiveness in a Relationship
All of these behavior patterns have a lot more to do with us than our partner. And most of them have deep roots in our past. As children, we developed strategies or defenses in an effort to protect ourselves from difficult or painful conditions. These early experiences shaped our expectations about relationships and the defenses we formed then still play out in our lives today.
That is why making sense of our own past and exploring our early attachment patterns can be very helpful in understanding our feelings of possessiveness as adults. As adults, we may project these feelings onto our partner, feeling like we need to make things happen, remind them to notice us, etc. We may have a lot of anxiety about their movement, fearing rejection or abandonment. As a result, we relive the past, clinging or making efforts to control our partner, so we can feel secure.
Unfortunately, because these feelings are rooted in our history, we rarely, if ever, get the reassurance we seek from acting out our old defenses in the present.
Instead, we repeat patterns from our childhood, acting on our insecurities, and often pushing our partner further away in the process. The patterns and defenses we form growing up may have been adaptive to our childhood, but they can hurt our current relationships. However, there are real steps we can take to break patterns of defensiveness and achieve an equal and trusting relationship.
Enhance our sense of self — If insecurity is at the root of our possessive behavior, we have to start to look at ways to bring more self-compassion into our lives.
We have to take steps to overcome our inner critic and truly accept that we are worthy and okay on our own, independent of anyone. We are strong and capable.If You're Too Clingy In A Relationship - WATCH THIS - Weekly Wisdom SE. 2 EP. 6
Even if our worst fears come true, and our partner does reject or betray us, we have to know that our world will not end. Feeling claustrophobic means there is possessiveness. Interrogating your partner implies you are possessive. Everyone has their little moments of emotional insecurity in a relationship.
Everyone is possessive about their loved one. However, there are different ways in which people showcase their possessiveness in relationships.
Some will be overtly possessive and give their partner no space in the relationship and some way employ passive aggressive methods to display their possessiveness. Keep a tab on the following signs of possessiveness in relationships Are you Cyber Stalking? Cyber stalking is a sure shot sign of possessiveness in relationships.
Signs of Possessiveness in Relationships
Is there no Space? If either your partner or you are feeling claustrophobic in the relationship, then one of you has definitely hit the possessive button.
Is there Always an Interrogation? Are you asked about every second day of your day by your partner? If that is the case then you definitely have a possessive one on your hands. Constantly seeking answers for every action initiated, can lead to problems in relationships. Accusations are also a direct result of possessiveness in relationships.
Hypersensitivity Possessive people will display traits of hypersensitivity.