Students have the same feelings. So it makes sense that developing positive teacher-student relations is one of the most effective steps you can take to establish. What do the experts say about building great teacher–student relationships? Sara Rimm-Kaufman and Lia Sandilos of the American Psychological Association. They hate school; hate everything about it. For a student who doesn't like school, a strong relationship with a teacher is a game changer.
Parent Input Helps No one knows their children better than their parents, so at the start of each school year, I ask them to send me a short note about their children to provide insights that will help me create an individualized program that best suits their child.
When I first began doing this years ago, I thought parents would give me the rose-colored glasses version of their children. These notes serve a higher purpose than letting me get to know the students.
4 Steps To Building A Strong Student-Teacher Relationship
They focus my head and heart on the fact that these parents are entrusting me for the next 40 weeks to teach and look after a child they love with all their heart. Sports is always a great common denominator. Once I learn who my sports fans are, morning greeting often includes a reference to what the Tigers did the night before or how the Wolverines and Spartans did on Saturday.
I ask about swim meets, soccer games, and belt ceremonies. When I make personalized clipboards as presents for each student in December, I try to decorate with stickers I think each student will enjoy. These small gestures help show students you care about what they care about. Speak to Students With Respect Every relationship relies on mutual respect and a teacher-student relationship is no different. There are definitely those times when student behavior causes me to feel frustrated.
When this happens I take a slow, deep breath or two! This helps me to respond to hairy situations with a calm, steady voice and a smile that just may be masking a completely different emotion. Attend Outside Activities If you have ever attended a student activity outside of school hours, you will know that as soon as that child spots you, he or she will break out into the biggest smile ever.
Parents would tell me how their kids would come home and tell them all about Katie, Rachel, and Charlie. To this day, my own children still make a point of coming in to get to know my class. There have been so many conversations over the years started by children who wanted to know what my kids were up to or when the next time was they would be coming to visit. One of my favorite events each year is when my students visit my house for a PTO fundraiser. My whole family helps entertain the boys and girls, and kids start asking on the very first day when they get to visit.
Opening a window to your world humanizes teachers and helps make you much more relatable and accessible to students. She realized she had been doing all of the talking. As teachers we talk a lot.
I know at times I monopolize the conversation. Be Real Let students see you make mistakes. When you tell a student that you know he will behave appropriately at recess because he was successful yesterday, you help build confidence in the student and increase his chance for success. And after a student demonstrates good behavior or academic achievement in a specific situation, telling her you knew she would be successful Kerman et al.
Students need to know that their teachers respect them and have confidence in them. Using these different strategies to consistently communicate your positive expectations will work wonders.
We challenge you to begin using one or two of these strategies today to build high expectations and positive teacher-student relations. Correcting Students in a Constructive Way Correcting and disciplining students for inappropriate behaviors is a necessary and important part of every teacher's job. However, it doesn't have to be a negative part of your job.
In fact, you can actually build positive relationships when you correct students. If you don't believe this, think for just a minute about students you have had in the past who came back to school to visit you.
Often it is the students who were the most challenging and with whom you had to spend the most time who continue to visit you over the years. This is due to the positive relationships you developed with them. The goal in correcting students should be to have them reflect on what they did, be sorry that they disappointed you, and make a better choice in the future.
I'm going to be sure I don't get caught next time. If you allow students to keep their dignity, you increase the chance that they will reflect on their behavior and choose their behaviors more wisely in the future. The correction process will be counterproductive if students are corrected in a manner that communicates bitterness, sarcasm, low expectations, or disgust.
The goal is to provide a quick, fair, and meaningful consequence while at the same time communicating that you care for and respect the student. Steps to Use When Correcting Students Review what happened Identify and accept the student's feelings Review alternative actions Explain the building policy as it applies to the situation Let the student know that all students are treated the same Invoke an immediate and meaningful consequence Let the student know you are disappointed that you have to invoke a consequence to his or her action Communicate an expectation that the student will do better in the future Imagine that Johnny hit Sam because Sam called his mother a name.
This is how you could put these disciplinary steps in place: Discuss the incident with Johnny. Begin with fact finding to be sure that you are appropriately correcting the student. The worst way to affect teacher-student relationships is to unfairly discipline a student. Identify and accept the student's feelings. Tell Johnny that you understand why it upset him to hear somebody call his mother a name and that you, too, would be upset if someone maligned your mother.
It's important to understand that this step communicates that you respect and understand his feelings but that you are not accepting his actions. Go over with Johnny the different actions he could have taken, such as ignoring the remark or reporting it to a teacher. Explain the building policy as it applies to the situation. Remind Johnny of the building policy of not fighting and that the rule is if anyone hits another student, he or she will be sent to the office and possibly be suspended from school.
Let the student know that all students are treated the same. Make sure that Johnny understands that all students must adhere to the policy and that any student who disregards the rule will suffer the consequences.
Invoke an immediate and meaningful consequence.
- Communicating Positive Expectations
- Correcting Students in a Constructive Way
- Create a List
Communicate with the office about what happened and send Johnny to the office. Let the student know you are disappointed that you have to invoke a consequence to his or her action.
Tell Johnny that you are disappointed that his actions have led to this situation. Communicate an expectation that the student will do better in the future. Remind Johnny that, although you do not approve of his actions and do not like to send him or any student to the office, you like him and know that he will make a better choice next time.
10 Ways to Build Relationships With Students This Year
Also tell him that you are there to support him and work through these issues with him in the future. In addition to your following these steps when correcting a student, it is important to keep some key philosophical precepts in mind. First of all, remember to correct the student in a private location. Although it is not always possible to remove a student from the classroom, do your best to prevent visual access by other students as you discipline.
Developing Positive Teacher-Student Relations
Public correction can foster feelings of anger, embarrassment, and bitterness; it can also become a sideshow for the other students. Finally, remember to stay calm and avoid frustration. The worst thing you can do is to invoke a consequence when you are angry or upset, as this can lead to regrettable actions on your part.
Key Philosophical Precepts When Correcting Students Correct in a private location Treat students as you want your own children treated Stay calm Avoid frustration It is also important to follow certain steps after disciplining a student. These steps are shown in Figure 1. Steps to Follow After Disciplining a Student Touch base with the student Acknowledge postdisciplinary successes Don't give up too quickly Let's go back to the example of Johnny, in which he earned an office referral because he hit Sam.